I'm So Excited, I Just Can't Hide It

Oh. My. Gosh.

I am SO excited!

I just got an email from a legislative assistant informing me that a Representative read my oped that was published a few weeks ago and expressing support. Besides the fact that it's just cool that they thought what I wrote was worth commenting on, do you know what this means?  It's an opportunity to develop a relationship and win a TRIO supporter!

Yes, he's just a state Representative but it's just as important to get state support as it is to get support from our US delegation. It's always blown my mind that people don't understand that. I get it, we're funded by the guys in DC, they have all the power.

But what people are missing is the fact that those guys in DC started somewhere and it's usually at the state level! If you can get their buy-in when you don't have a lot of competition, when you can make it something they really care about then they are  more likely to support it when they get to DC. You make it their passion, not just yours.

And even if they never leave the state - the more "powerful" supporters we get, the better. There are all kinds of opportunities for advocacy/freebies/favors when you have a connected supporter.

I'm really not trying to gloat - I am just super, super excited about this!

My day is made!

Ain't No Mountain High Enough

Ever have so much to do that you don't even know where to begin?  That's me today.  I'm just not able to focus or get anything done.  I'm just spinning my wheels, completely unproductive. I would like to get some things but I just...can't.

So here's some random, unrelated, unimportant commentary to keep me distracted:

There's a guy in our building, about my age that I only run into when I'm wearing the same two dresses. I swear, I hardly ever see this guy but when I do I'm in the same dang thing! Not that he even notices, but how does that keep happening? I have a lot of clothes. A lot. 

***And that's as far as I got.*** 

See, I told you I was having a tough time concentrating!  Just so you know, that was from Monday - the rest of the week was much more productive.

Looking forward to the weekend. We've got adult plans tonight and then of course HALLOWEEN!

I LOVE Halloween! It's just such a fun holiday. I mean, dressing up and candy?  Who doesn't love that? I work extra hard to make sure my girls develop that same love. Again - dressing up and candy - it isn't too hard. And of course they take after their momma - anything with candy and they're in.

I took them to a little Halloween party last night - kept them up way too late but it was worth it. Plus, we're sticking them with my Mom tonight so I don't have to deal with their lack-of-sleep grumpiness.

And then of course I have got to catch up on laundry! M came to me this morning and said "Mom. Our dirty clothes basket is up to here." as she put her hand almost up to her eye.  And the sad thing is, she's probably not even exaggerating.

I do have a semi-reasonable defense though - besides my natural laziness and inherent disdain for housework.  I'm only allowed to do one load of laundry a day! Seriously.  It's in our lease. Something about the water lines and the threat of being responsible if they burst...or something. All I really paid attention to was the "one load per day" part. Because I like to stockpile my laundry. Okay, it's not that I really "like" to...it's actually just a result of me trying to avoid it.

So what I usually do, what I've always done, is just do a whole bunch of laundry in one purge - load after load after load after load after Dear Lord, please make it stop! 

And like pulling a band-aid, it hurts for a second and then it's over. Finally.

So this whole one load a day crap. It's not going over so well.

Honestly, I just forget to do it more than anything. I'm just still not used to having to get a load in every night to get it all done. Laundry is totally not on my radar. The hubby has been working almost every night after work until 8 or 9 so I've been single parenting it for a while.  By the time we get home, get dinner, get through homework, get the dishes done (and have I bitched about not having a dishwasher yet?  If not, remind me and I'll get to it in a minute), and get the house picked up - the only thing I want to do is nothing.

See what a whinebag I am?  This is like any normal night for anyone and I'm over here like "But I'm too tired to do laundry! Waaaahhhhaaa"

But seriously, this fourth grade homework stuff is no joke. I'm embarrassed to admit that there have been multiple occasions that I could not help with math homework. Multiple. Isn't that horrible?  I mean, I have multiple college degrees and I can't work fourth grade math? Wow. I don't even know how that's possible.  Well, yeah I do...I suck at math.

So yeah, my weekend will be filled with costumes, candy and lots of tears as I wade through the mountain of laundry....

Midnight Madness

Had a great meeting today!

It's so exciting when things come together. This organization focuses on moving people from housing vouchers to self sufficiency- either through employment or education. Which is where I come in- send them to me and let me help them graduate! Of course, the program could also be beneficial for some of our students getting housing assistance because they offer a cash incentive to move them in that direction (self sufficiency). So it's definitely a win-win.

I drove back to the office blasting music and singing (screeching) at the top of my lungs, I was so pumped about the prospect of this partnership. In addition to working with them, they also shared some other state programs that would be beneficial to get connected to, so good things are bound to come out of this.

Of course I was also thinking about what I said and how socially awkward I am...I'm just so dorky! But I didn't let that drown my excitement.

Know what's not exciting? Writing a grant that I'm not qualified to write...really struggling here. It doesn't help that I don't have any work space at home. Hard to concentrate when Barbershop is on and I'm planted right in front of the tv. I really have to wait until everyone is asleep before I can get a good workflow so I'm burning the midnight oil getting it done. Or trying to get it done, anyway.

And then, of course, I jump on the internet and play as a distraction. Anything to avoid doing the thing I need to do the very most!

Monday, Monday

Today kicked my butt!

After a four day weekend, it was a tough Monday.  Spent the long weekend up at Lake Tenkiller for some much needed fun. Did a tiny bit of fishing, a whole lot of eating and even more laughing.

Happy girl. I think I need to laugh more often...

Attempted to make my first ever jello shots. Mainly because I wanted to use my brand new OU jello mold. I didn't have any vodka so I improvised with coconut rum...no clue if it would work but it was the best I could do. After hours of waiting the moment of truth arrived - they were ready.  But I couldn't get the dang things out!  No matter what I did, those little suckers were stuck.  After a full jello rescue team, we managed to get two out intact, the rest were just a clump of jello blobness. Didn't stop us from eating them though, those things are good!

Can you even tell those are shaped like OU?

We got home yesterday with enough time for me to unpack bags, do laundry and get the house in order for the start of the week. I have a couple of big projects going. Actually, one super big project that I need to have finished by Thursday. And it's not looking promising because I made very little progress today. I was productive but had too many fires and interruptions to make any real progress.

I had something super exciting happen though. Well, exciting to me. I got a phone call from a man who read my op-ed in the paper. *Last weekend on our way to Tulsa I got a sweet text from a friend with the following picture, letting me know he had read my op-ed. I have the best friends! 

This guy runs a program through the Housing Authority and he said he had never heard of TRIO until reading my article but he felt like we might be able to collaborate. He wanted me to come out to speak with his staff and educate them on TRIO and learn more about their program too.  It's a little thing but I am super pumped - that's what advocacy is all about! 

So I'm meeting with him tomorrow. Of course, it's one more thing I'm trying to cram in but it's totally worth it!  Going to try to knock a few things out tonight. Kids are in bed, hubby is working - let's see how much work Momma can get done!

The Good, The Bad & The Ugly

The Bad:

It was a rough weekend for the Sooners.

We played an unbelievably horrible game and lost to…TEXAS!  Really? Of all games, this is the game you choke on? No, no, no!  This was not the game!

I can’t even begin to express how mad I was. Largely because it took me by surprise. I was completely unprepared. My husband tried to warn me but I wouldn’t listen. I just knew there was no way Texas was going to win. They’ve been sucking all season…I mean, I know its Red River. I know anything can happen but honestly, I just didn’t think Texas had it in them. And poor Charlie Strong seemed so defeated…it was OU’s game, for sure.

Headed to watch what I THOUGHT would be blow out...

Five minutes into the game and I knew we were in trouble. I tried to stay optimistic, told myself they just needed to warm up. But they weren’t ever able to get it together. We fell apart and handed the game away.  It was infuriating.  

We were at a football party so I tried to behave and act like a decent lady. I must report that I failed miserably on that count. I don’t cuss too often but man, I was letting them fly. At fist my husband was like “Whoa, with the language” and “Hey, hey, hey” but by the end of the second quarter he knew better than to say anything.  Of course, his friends thought it was hilarious that I was cussing because they’ve never heard me talk like that – even though we’ve watched plenty of games with these guys, I’ve always behaved. 

In full disclosure, some of that may have been alcohol driven. Because I knew I was going to need something to make it through that game. And it did help me through. So much so that I don’t really remember the last half of the game. Except the losing part. Because that hurt my heart.

I’ve discovered a really weird phenomenon too. I can’t handle beer. At all. It’s the weirdest thing because Long Island Iced Tea is my favorite drink. If someone is hosting and can’t make it, I’ll have a Screwdriver (my second favorite) but if I’m out drinking, I’m ordering a Tea. There are five different types of alcohol in that drink and I handle it just fine – I’ll have two and feel comfortably tipsy.

But give me a couple of beers and I am jacked up.

As soon as it was over, I found my husband and desperately whispered “We need to go. Now.”  It’s one thing to let someone hear me cuss but something entirely different to let them see me sloppy. I was not about to let that happen. I don’t care how good the party, if I feel like I’m getting sloppy, I am out.

So like a good hubby, he whisked me away to our hotel room and put me to bed.

It was as comfy as it looks - I slept like a baby

I woke up heartbroken and hungry. But the weekend wasn’t a total loss because when I texted the husband that I was awake, he told me everyone was gathering for dinner. I had a delicious grilled salmon and then went off to play some slot machines.

No luck with Cleopatra

I actually spent most of that time just walking around and people watching. It’s fascinating to me to watch people in a casino. I mean, I enjoy people watching in general, but casinos are something special. I noticed that there was no one and I mean no one was wearing any type of OU apparel. Nothing. No shirts, no hats – nothing. Except for me, of course.  Fair weather fans!  One of the guys (an OSU fan) was giving me hell during dinner because of it but I didn’t care – a fan is a fan until the end. No matter how badly they sucked.

The Good:

After a while I found most of the group gathered around a card table.  I don’t play cards.  I’ve never played and I don’t know how. So when we go to a casino, I just ignore that whole entire section. 

But most of our friends play those tables so there they were – huddled around either playing or watching. When you don’t know how the game works, it isn’t fun to watch. Plus, I was out of money.  So I was ready to head to the room when one of the guys grabbed me and drug me to a Blackjack table, despite my objections. Even after I adamantly told him I had no clue what to do, he laid out $100 for me to play on. It was very generous and very nice. But also a little awkward too. He’s more of an acquaintance than friend and I just felt bad wasting his money. Granted, the guy is loaded and he couldn’t care less – when I told him I couldn’t take his money, I’m pretty sure he intentionally flashed his huge wad of money in front of me – but it was just the principle of taking his money that didn’t feel right.  

But he was insistent, so I played. As we were placing our bets, he looked at me and said “You feel lucky?” and I laughed and said “I’m always lucky!” And guess what?  I was!

I kept getting these great hands and winning. Of course, I was betting small but I was on a streak. In about 30 minutes made enough to give him his $100 back and walked away with enough to pay for our hotel room. Win! 

It was super fun but I still didn’t feel right taking his money.

As we were going to our room, my hubby asked if he hit on me. Which made me laugh and melt at the same time. This guy is married to a Barbie doll, so the fact that my husband would think there’s a chance this guy would be interested in me…it was super sweet. He wasn’t hitting on me at all, but I’m glad my husband is still under my spell enough to think it’s a possibility.

The Ugly:

Morning view - Hardrock golf course & sunshine

After a lazy morning and a late breakfast, we were heading home when I put my hand in my lap and felt…something.  I looked down only to realize that my jeans had a hole in them. But not really a hole…it was a spot that had been worn thin. Coincidentally, that spot just happened to be right where my thighs meet. Yep, the friction from my thighs wore a hole in my jeans. Talk about depressing. And shocking. I’ve never been big enough for that to happen before…it was a good wake-up call though because I got my fat, thigh rubbing butt in the gym the very next day!

I'm mad but proud - still sporting OU
the next day. BOOMER!

Nuts

One of the advantages of living in a super small trailer is that it’s really easy to clean. The disadvantage is that if anything is left out, it looks cluttered. I mean anything. Shoes in the living room? Cluttered. Jacket on the back of the chair? Cluttered. School bag and papers across the table. Super cluttered.

So I’ve really had to make an effort to keep on top of things. I’m beginning to develop an eagle eye for anything out of place. Well, not really develop...I've always had a knack for catching details. I would say I'm really observant but that's not really true because while I have the ability to see the little things, the super obvious things usually escape me.

Like the time my boyfriend picked me up at the airport and I totally missed the fact that he had hickeys all over his neck.  But I immediately knew someone (Miss Hickey Giver)  had been in our apartment by the way a chair had been moved. Hickeys=obvious thing, arrangement of a chair=small thing. Wasting my time on such a loser=stupid thing.

Apparently not only do I make poor choices in men, but  I only focus on the small stuff...

Which may be why I noticed the teeny tiny peanut on my bed yesterday.

Okay, so what’s the big deal about a peanut, right? 

The big deal is that it wasn’t there in the morning.

I came home from work, went to the bedroom to change my clothes and the minute I looked at the bed I saw it – a single peanut. Right in the center of the bed.

I promise you, that peanut was not there when I left!

Here’s how I know:  First, there aren’t any peanuts in my house. None. Not even mixed in with anything. Not that I’m hating on peanuts, I just don’t happen to have any. When I pointed that out to my husband, his explanation was that when we went to visit my mom (2 days prior) we ate some peanuts and that one must have traveled home with us.

Okay, so just say we did carry one home and it happened to make it all the way to the bedroom and onto the bed…I haven’t had a good night’s sleep since we moved. Part of it is that I still don’t feel settled and part of it is that we downsized our bed and it sucks. If you’ve ever slept over at our house and stayed in the guest room – I’m sorry. I had no idea about the bed.

So I’ve been tossing and turning and flopping around each night. I know because my husband has been complaining about it. It’s hard for me to believe through all that a peanut would be able to stay on top of the covers. Wouldn’t it have landed on the floor?

But even if it did survive my restless sleep– I make my bed in the morning. And I’m meticulous about lining the duvet cover up so I yank it around until it’s straight.  Then I smooth it out. And I'm telling you that peanut was not there!

We had cable/internet installed yesterday (thank goodness!) and we put a line in the bedroom so my husband was quick to point out that maybe the installer was eating peanuts. First, no. He wasn’t. I was there and there was no eating of peanuts. It didn’t happen. So maybe he had one buried in his pocket and he flicked it out onto my bed when I wasn't looking?

That could, maybe, be possible except I went in to change as soon as he left. I laid my clothes out on the bed. I would have noticed the peanut!

Okay, so it’s really strange but it’s a little thing and you blow it off, right?

And I probably totally would. Except…

The other day hubby accused me of drinking all the cokes from the fridge and not replacing them. That was just weird because I do replace them. I’m usually the only one to replace them.  But I only had like two. And of course, he said he only had two. I thought he probably drank more than he realized. And I’m sure he probably thought the same about me...

But honestly, now I’m beginning to wonder. When I shared that with my husband he acted like I was crazy and said “So what, someone is breaking in to eat and drink in our house?”

Which, when you put it that way, does kinda sound crazy.

But then again, crazy things happen all the time….

Big, Bad Me

I know one of these days my mouth is going to get me in trouble.

But I just keep going...

I pulled into a busy gas station - all the stall were filled except one.  The guy was at the second pump but his car was pulled up so far that no one else could get to the first pump. Whatever.

I pulled in behind him because he looked like he was about done.  And he was.

He got back in his car. And sat.

And just sat there.

I tried to be patient but let's be honest, that's not my strength.  So I roll down my window and nicely yell "Are you done pumping your gas?"  And he's looking at me in his mirror and he nods yes.

Okayyy, then why aren't you moving? Do you not notice the multiple cars around you, waiting?

Deep breath.

Okay, so maybe he didn't notice me before, but now he knows I'm waiting so he'll get it together and move.

Nope.

He's still just sitting there.

Clogging up an entire stall.

And sitting. And sitting.

Oh my God. Is this guy for real?

And I'm mad because now he's just being a jerk.

So I jump out of my car and I march up to him.  I know, brilliant move, right?  And I say, as nicely as I can - and trust me, it took a lot of effort to not say what I really wanted to say-  "If you're done pumping gas, can you move up? I'm waiting behind you."

And the freaking moron looks at me and says no! Then he says something about waiting on someone inside but I didn't really hear that part because I was too busy being pissed off.

ARE YOU KIDDING ME?

And yes, the "Are you kidding me?" part actually did come out of my mouth.

You're taking up two gas pumps and you won't move?!?

PULL UP TO A PARKING SPACE!

By this time another stall had opened up so I whip around. I had to walk by him to pay so I mumbled something mean and nasty that I'm not entirely proud of, just to make sure he knew what I thought about him.

Then after I had a second to get over it I thought about how stupid that really was - because really, he could have jumped out of his car and sucker punched me. Or done something worse.  Because let's face it, I'm not really equipped to deal with any kind of physical confrontation. I mean, I'm gonna fight like hell but I'm going to lose. No question, I will lose.

So I've got to remember that I'm not as tough on the outside as I feel on the inside and get my mouth in check before somebody decides they should do it for me...