I am so grateful that I made the decision to attend the funeral. I'm embarrassed that it was even a consideration that I wouldn't. I was just too wrapped up in what I "had" to do, too wrapped up in my own life really. And that's horrible.
There was a lot of chaos and disorder in planning the trip - no one knew if they were going to go until the last minute, we all had different flights, we had to coordinate travel to/from airport and hotel. It was just a lot. There was also a lot of anxiety about how our other family, whom none of us had met, would receive us. None of us knew what kind of environment we were walking into. And then, of course, there was the issue of my Dad. And that's always stressful and unpleasant.
So there was a lot of anxiety, a lot of emotion. Everyone was on edge. But it turned out to be a good experience. The travel fell into place, we were welcomed with open arms, and the funeral service was so touching. It's an amazing family and I'm so glad to have connected with them - they are such wonderful people. And it was so good to hear stories of my granddad - so many things that I didn't know. And there is still so much more to find out.
While we were there, after almost 20 years, we got to visit our Aunt. Isn't that crazy? 20 years is a long time! I've maintained a relationship with her through email but it's not the same. It was so weird to finally see her again. And it's funny because my image of her was from 20 years ago and I'm sure it was the same for her. She must have been shocked at how much we've changed. And aged. I know I've put on a few years... I mean, I wasn't even able to drive the last time I saw her!
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| 20 years later... |
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| Hugs! |
It was also really great just to spend some time with my husband and sisters. Although the circumstances were bad, we still really enjoyed each other. We were all experiencing stress, anxiety and grief but we pulled together and it made us bond even more. No bickering or annoyances...at least from my part. They might have something different to say about me regarding the annoying part....but I know the experience makes me appreciate and love each of them even more than I already did.
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| This is what my hubby does when I'm being too loud... |
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| Me and my baby sis... |
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| Part of my prank. Yes, it is suppose to look like dirty toilet paper... |
And how ironic is it that we fly to southern California only to be greeted with wet, cold weather (colder than Oklahoma) and then to have earthquakes back home...it was so strange!
We flew in and the next morning it was off to conference. I felt out of the loop coming in at the end of it but that was better than not being there at all. And it was all handled and taken care of - L.R. did an excellent job getting the exhibitors set up. Really, she handled it all. Unfortunately, I wasn't able to present. My co-presenter lost her voice. Just gone. And that's kind of important when you're giving a presentation. We decided we'll do it next year. And we've talked about even doing it at our national conference. We shall see...
The best part of the conference, however, was getting to see some dear friends and getting in a little time with them. We had a wonderful lunch today and then we made a visit to Pinkitzel. I had actually never been...I know, I know - how could I not go when I live so close? It's pretty simple: little self control and visiting cupcake places is not wise so it's just best to avoid altogether. It was a good cupcake but I couldn't finish it - it was waaay too sweet. That actually was a good thing though - I was still full so I had a really, really small dinner. Who knows, I may start having a late afternoon cupcake each day, just to keep the late night eating to a minimum....
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| A box full of temptation... |
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