Tuesday, October 13, 2015

The Good, The Bad & The Ugly

The Bad:
It was a rough weekend for the Sooners.

We played an unbelievably horrible game and lost to…TEXAS!  Really? Of all games, this is the game you choke on? No, no, no!  This was not the game!

I can’t even begin to express how mad I was. Largely because it took me by surprise. I was completely unprepared. My husband tried to warn me but I wouldn’t listen. I just knew there was no way Texas was going to win. They’ve been sucking all season…I mean, I know its Red River. I know anything can happen but honestly, I just didn’t think Texas had it in them. And poor Charlie Strong seemed so defeated…it was OU’s game, for sure.

Headed to watch what I THOUGHT would be blow out...
Five minutes into the game and I knew we were in trouble. I tried to stay optimistic, told myself they just needed to warm up. But they weren’t ever able to get it together. We fell apart and handed the game away.  It was infuriating.  

We were at a football party so I tried to behave and act like a decent lady. I must report that I failed miserably on that count. I don’t cuss too often but man, I was letting them fly. At fist my husband was like “Whoa, with the language” and “Hey, hey, hey” but by the end of the second quarter he knew better than to say anything.  Of course, his friends thought it was hilarious that I was cussing because they’ve never heard me talk like that – even though we’ve watched plenty of games with these guys, I’ve always behaved. 

In full disclosure, some of that may have been alcohol driven. Because I knew I was going to need something to make it through that game. And it did help me through. So much so that I don’t really remember the last half of the game. Except the losing part. Because that hurt my heart.

I’ve discovered a really weird phenomenon too. I can’t handle beer. At all. It’s the weirdest thing because Long Island Iced Tea is my favorite drink. If someone is hosting and can’t make it, I’ll have a Screwdriver (my second favorite) but if I’m out drinking, I’m ordering a Tea. There are five different types of alcohol in that drink and I handle it just fine – I’ll have two and feel comfortably tipsy.

But give me a couple of beers and I am jacked up.

As soon as it was over, I found my husband and desperately whispered “We need to go. Now.”  It’s one thing to let someone hear me cuss but something entirely different to let them see me sloppy. I was not about to let that happen. I don’t care how good the party, if I feel like I’m getting sloppy, I am out.

So like a good hubby, he whisked me away to our hotel room and put me to bed.

It was as comfy as it looks - I slept like a baby

I woke up heartbroken and hungry. But the weekend wasn’t a total loss because when I texted the husband that I was awake, he told me everyone was gathering for dinner. I had a delicious grilled salmon and then went off to play some slot machines.

No luck with Cleopatra
I actually spent most of that time just walking around and people watching. It’s fascinating to me to watch people in a casino. I mean, I enjoy people watching in general, but casinos are something special. I noticed that there was no one and I mean no one was wearing any type of OU apparel. Nothing. No shirts, no hats – nothing. Except for me, of course.  Fair weather fans!  One of the guys (an OSU fan) was giving me hell during dinner because of it but I didn’t care – a fan is a fan until the end. No matter how badly they sucked.

The Good:
After a while I found most of the group gathered around a card table.  I don’t play cards.  I’ve never played and I don’t know how. So when we go to a casino, I just ignore that whole entire section. 

But most of our friends play those tables so there they were – huddled around either playing or watching. When you don’t know how the game works, it isn’t fun to watch. Plus, I was out of money.  So I was ready to head to the room when one of the guys grabbed me and drug me to a Blackjack table, despite my objections. Even after I adamantly told him I had no clue what to do, he laid out $100 for me to play on. It was very generous and very nice. But also a little awkward too. He’s more of an acquaintance than friend and I just felt bad wasting his money. Granted, the guy is loaded and he couldn’t care less – when I told him I couldn’t take his money, I’m pretty sure he intentionally flashed his huge wad of money in front of me – but it was just the principle of taking his money that didn’t feel right.  

But he was insistent, so I played. As we were placing our bets, he looked at me and said “You feel lucky?” and I laughed and said “I’m always lucky!” And guess what?  I was!

I kept getting these great hands and winning. Of course, I was betting small but I was on a streak. In about 30 minutes made enough to give him his $100 back and walked away with enough to pay for our hotel room. Win! 

It was super fun but I still didn’t feel right taking his money.

As we were going to our room, my hubby asked if he hit on me. Which made me laugh and melt at the same time. This guy is married to a Barbie doll, so the fact that my husband would think there’s a chance this guy would be interested in me…it was super sweet. He wasn’t hitting on me at all, but I’m glad my husband is still under my spell enough to think it’s a possibility.

The Ugly:

Morning view - Hardrock golf course & sunshine

After a lazy morning and a late breakfast, we were heading home when I put my hand in my lap and felt…something.  I looked down only to realize that my jeans had a hole in them. But not really a hole…it was a spot that had been worn thin. Coincidentally, that spot just happened to be right where my thighs meet. Yep, the friction from my thighs wore a hole in my jeans. Talk about depressing. And shocking. I’ve never been big enough for that to happen before…it was a good wake-up call though because I got my fat, thigh rubbing butt in the gym the very next day!

I'm mad but proud - still sporting OU
the next day. BOOMER!

Wednesday, October 7, 2015

Nuts

One of the advantages of living in a super small trailer is that it’s really easy to clean. The disadvantage is that if anything is left out, it looks cluttered. I mean anything. Shoes in the living room? Cluttered. Jacket on the back of the chair? Cluttered. School bag and papers across the table. Super cluttered.

So I’ve really had to make an effort to keep on top of things. I’m beginning to develop an eagle eye for anything out of place. Well, not really develop...I've always had a knack for catching details. I would say I'm really observant but that's not really true because while I have the ability to see the little things, the super obvious things usually escape me.

Like the time my boyfriend picked me up at the airport and I totally missed the fact that he had hickeys all over his neck.  But I immediately knew someone (Miss Hickey Giver)  had been in our apartment by the way a chair had been moved. Hickeys=obvious thing, arrangement of a chair=small thing. Wasting my time on such a loser=stupid thing.

Apparently not only do I make poor choices in men, but  I only focus on the small stuff...

Which may be why I noticed the teeny tiny peanut on my bed yesterday.

Okay, so what’s the big deal about a peanut, right? 

The big deal is that it wasn’t there in the morning.

I came home from work, went to the bedroom to change my clothes and the minute I looked at the bed I saw it – a single peanut. Right in the center of the bed.

I promise you, that peanut was not there when I left!

Here’s how I know:  First, there aren’t any peanuts in my house. None. Not even mixed in with anything. Not that I’m hating on peanuts, I just don’t happen to have any. When I pointed that out to my husband, his explanation was that when we went to visit my mom (2 days prior) we ate some peanuts and that one must have traveled home with us.

Okay, so just say we did carry one home and it happened to make it all the way to the bedroom and onto the bed…I haven’t had a good night’s sleep since we moved. Part of it is that I still don’t feel settled and part of it is that we downsized our bed and it sucks. If you’ve ever slept over at our house and stayed in the guest room – I’m sorry. I had no idea about the bed.

So I’ve been tossing and turning and flopping around each night. I know because my husband has been complaining about it. It’s hard for me to believe through all that a peanut would be able to stay on top of the covers. Wouldn’t it have landed on the floor?

But even if it did survive my restless sleep– I make my bed in the morning. And I’m meticulous about lining the duvet cover up so I yank it around until it’s straight.  Then I smooth it out. And I'm telling you that peanut was not there!

We had cable/internet installed yesterday (thank goodness!) and we put a line in the bedroom so my husband was quick to point out that maybe the installer was eating peanuts. First, no. He wasn’t. I was there and there was no eating of peanuts. It didn’t happen. So maybe he had one buried in his pocket and he flicked it out onto my bed when I wasn't looking?

That could, maybe, be possible except I went in to change as soon as he left. I laid my clothes out on the bed. I would have noticed the peanut!
Okay, so it’s really strange but it’s a little thing and you blow it off, right?

And I probably totally would. Except…

The other day hubby accused me of drinking all the cokes from the fridge and not replacing them. That was just weird because I do replace them. I’m usually the only one to replace them.  But I only had like two. And of course, he said he only had two. I thought he probably drank more than he realized. And I’m sure he probably thought the same about me...

But honestly, now I’m beginning to wonder. When I shared that with my husband he acted like I was crazy and said “So what, someone is breaking in to eat and drink in our house?”

Which, when you put it that way, does kinda sound crazy.

But then again, crazy things happen all the time….

Thursday, October 1, 2015

Big, Bad Me

I know one of these days my mouth is going to get me in trouble.

But I just keep going...

I pulled into a busy gas station - all the stall were filled except one.  The guy was at the second pump but his car was pulled up so far that no one else could get to the first pump. Whatever.

I pulled in behind him because he looked like he was about done.  And he was.

He got back in his car. And sat.

And just sat there.

I tried to be patient but let's be honest, that's not my strength.  So I roll down my window and nicely yell "Are you done pumping your gas?"  And he's looking at me in his mirror and he nods yes.

Okayyy, then why aren't you moving? Do you not notice the multiple cars around you, waiting?

Deep breath.

Okay, so maybe he didn't notice me before, but now he knows I'm waiting so he'll get it together and move.

Nope.

He's still just sitting there.

Clogging up an entire stall.

And sitting. And sitting.

Oh my God. Is this guy for real?

And I'm mad because now he's just being a jerk.

So I jump out of my car and I march up to him.  I know, brilliant move, right?  And I say, as nicely as I can - and trust me, it took a lot of effort to not say what I really wanted to say-  "If you're done pumping gas, can you move up? I'm waiting behind you."

And the freaking moron looks at me and says no! Then he says something about waiting on someone inside but I didn't really hear that part because I was too busy being pissed off.

ARE YOU KIDDING ME?

And yes, the "Are you kidding me?" part actually did come out of my mouth.

You're taking up two gas pumps and you won't move?!?

PULL UP TO A PARKING SPACE!

By this time another stall had opened up so I whip around. I had to walk by him to pay so I mumbled something mean and nasty that I'm not entirely proud of, just to make sure he knew what I thought about him.

Then after I had a second to get over it I thought about how stupid that really was - because really, he could have jumped out of his car and sucker punched me. Or done something worse.  Because let's face it, I'm not really equipped to deal with any kind of physical confrontation. I mean, I'm gonna fight like hell but I'm going to lose. No question, I will lose.

So I've got to remember that I'm not as tough on the outside as I feel on the inside and get my mouth in check before somebody decides they should do it for me...

Wednesday, September 23, 2015

WTH

Greetings from the land of chaos and mess!

I arrived home from Atlanta late Saturday night and hit the ground running the next morning with moving.  We're about 95% done and living out of the last remaining boxes. It's super fun.

I got a call yesterday from our realtor; the buyers had "concerns" about our driveway.  Let me tell you, any time your realtor says there are "concerns" - that is a super bad thing.  Like they're not sure they want to buy the house until they can figure out this driveway thing. Since the houses are all super old, most the homes in our area do not have driveways.  We're the only house on the block to have one but they aren't convinced it's actually ours.

They had the survey pulled and it's clear as day to me, to the hubby and to our realtor but they're having trouble understanding it. I am super pissed - why is this coming up  three days before closing? Are you kidding me?  We've already signed a lease, put up deposit, paid first month's rent and had the expense of moving - we're already into this thing!

Our realtor mentioned getting a pin survey but those are expensive (about $800) and we're not putting out any more money. We've already been more than generous with them. We're putting a lot of money towards their closing and then they asked for $1,000 in repairs after the inspection came back with just a few minor things. I'm done. These people are ridiculous.

Let's hope they figure it out and don't back out - I will go ballistic. Seriously, it will not be pretty.

In the meantime, we're waiting on pins and needles for these people to get their act together. And I'm reminiscing to a week ago when I got to play in Atlanta...

On the balcony of our hotel - rare that it actually opened

College Football Hall of Fame

Go OU!


Listening to Elton John in the park - it was awesome!

The drunk guy next to me got up and there was a GIANT wet stain.
I'm pretty sure it's pee!

Then I decided all the seats were probably really GROSS
so I only sat part of my cheek on the seat

MLK's church

Finally at the airport at 11 - waiting on my ride!



Tuesday, September 8, 2015

Fright Fest

So my Financial Aid buddy came to visit me in my new office. He was checking out our new digs when he casually mentions the office being haunted. Just drops it in the middle of the conversation like he's asking about lunch. "You know this office is haunted, right?"

He's a comedian and messes with everyone so I thought he was joking. He spent a minute or two trying to convince me he wasn't playing - he had really been told that by the last people in our office. He even encouraged me to ask her about it... I was still skeptical that he was serious until the assistant director vouched for the story.

No, no she didn't. She didn't vouch for it, she completely reinforced it. Her daughter was a work study in that office and heard unexplained noises all the time. Apparently everyone did and they all believed it was a ghost.

Then he asked me if I knew about the suicide.

Huh?

According to the story a security guard committed suicide in our building and it was rumored that it was his ghost. He told me that our campus was listed on several haunted websites and told me to look it up.

Which I did.

Everything I found indicated it happened...labor day. Uh, how disturbing is that? 

I don't believe in ghost and realize it's all probably some exaggerated story telling but I have to admit, the early mornings when I'm all alone in the office is starting to feel just a little bit creepy...


Sunday, September 6, 2015

Transition #3

It's past 10 p.m. and I just got home from driving the whole 5 miles across town to get a drink.  I needed to get out of the house. I needed to just roll down the windows, turn up the music and drive. What I really wanted was to get in the car and just run away. And never come back.

Of course I really wouldn't do that.

Because I didn't have much money on me and half a tank will only get you so far...

But seriously. I did consider it for like a nanosecond.

I am overwhelmed.

Partly because I had a hell of a day at work but mostly because we have a contract on our house.

That really wasn't how I intended to share that news. I had thought it would be more like Awesome news! We SOLD OUR HOUSE!

Except that I waited just long enough to share it that the reality and complications have begun to kick in.

Don't get me wrong - I am really happy. Beyond happy.  This is such a good thing for us and I'm super glad it happened so quick. 43 days on the market - not too bad for our little town.

So it's good, not just financially but also getting our life back. Not to gripe about it too much but oh. my. God. that whole keeping the house spotless and having to drop everything for a showing was getting old.

The buyers wanted to move quickly so we're scheduled to close on the 25th. We had the home inspection Monday and everything looks good on that end but anything can happen. You just never know what can pop up.  Which makes it difficult to move forward with plans.

I've been looking for rental property in our new house school district since we put our house on the market. The bad thing about moving to a little bitty town is that there is nothing there. Literally, there's not even a post office. So there aren't a whole lot of rental options.   I found one house - a small little 3 bedroom brick home that looked like most our rentals....except that guy was charging $1150 per month for his.

So either we're just way off with our pricing or it's a racket. And we're not way off with our pricing.

We drove around our new area one night - hoping to find something. We were about to head back home when we found it...a trailer. I never in my life imagined living in a trailer. I know it sounds snobby but I just...didn't.  It's funny because if anyone else told me that's where they live, I wouldn't think anything. No judgement, no negativity, nothing. Yet I find it embarrassing for myself.

But desperate times call for desperate measures and I wrote down the number.  When you have no options, you forget about being embarrassed and you write that dang number down.

So looks like life is having the last laugh because I'm officially moving into a trailer. And not just a trailer - a trailer in a trailer park. Just keeps getting better, doesn't it?

And in case you're wondering - no, we couldn't just get a trailer and put it on our property. City ordinances don't allow it - which is great if you're worried about people putting up trailers next to your house but sucks if you need a place to live while you build that house.

We're nervous about signing a lease until we know for certain that everything is going to go through because we certainly don't want to be stuck paying rent and a mortgage. The park manager won't let us do a month to month so our only option was to pay a deposit and first months rent to hold the place.  We don't get keys, however, until we sign a lease.

Don't ask me how that's right, since we've already paid for September.  How do we not have access to a place that we've paid for? But we don't which means we can't move anything in yet.  And since the trailer is about 1/4 of the size of our current home, we'll actually be moving three times.  One time to take all our current storage crap to the new storage building, another time to take some of our home crap to the new storage building and finally to take the rest of our home crap to the new home. It's going to be a lot of work.

Hubby doesn't want to sign the lease until the day before or day of our closing. But there is no way that will work. We've been bickering about when to sign it. I wanted to get it scheduled for this weekend so I could start cleaning and moving things over, especially since it's a holiday and I would have an extra day.  He thought that was too soon. I'm trying to figure out his timeline, but I just don't see it. I have a conference in two weeks - I'm doing some pre-conference stuff so it's an extra long trip. I'll fly out early Monday morning and won't get back until late Saturday.  We're scheduled to close the next Friday.  So when exactly are we supposed to move again?

I just think we're going to have to take a leap of faith. We need to make a calculated decision and just do it. If the house sell falls through (which it won't), we'll deal with it.  He wants the sure thing and isn't willing to take the risk. That pretty much sums up our personalities. I'm more inclined to take risk and deal with the blows if they come while mostly believing they never will.  He wants to play it safe and is always strategizing to avoid the blows that he is certain are coming.

I have a request in to the buyer that they allow us an extra weekend - that would solve everything. So keep your fingers crossed and wish us luck - we're gonna need it!




Tuesday, September 1, 2015

Movin On Up

First, let me say I'm a loser.



A loser with no willpower. 

Yep. I'm back on Dr. Pepper. 

Which is especially frustrating because I really need to get on track since I currently look about 5 months pregnant. No joke - I really do. I have no waist - it's just a big, squishy lump. All my friends are getting in shape and looking hot and I'm over here blowing up like Kim Kardashian's ego. 

If I'm careful, I can tip my head just right so that I don't have three chins but there isn't much I can do about the tummy. Or the hips. Ugh, I don't even want to talk about it. I only shared because you can't make a proclamation about quitting something and then just never mention it again.  Well, I mean you can...but then everyone knows you've slipped anyway. So I just wanted to get that out of the way.

What I really want to tell you about is our new office space!  Yep, we got a new office!

When our program was originally funded we had the most jacked-up set-up that you can imagine. We had two offices side-by-side on the first floor - no reception area, no waiting area, just two offices off a hall. Our lab, where students are supposed to hang out, was on the second floor.

I don't know about you but that didn't seem like a really great idea to me. I was never really comfortable having a lab that wasn't monitored so we really didn't utilize it as it was intended.

The office right next door to our lab belonged to the director of the program that was downstairs. Next to our offices.  So he was up here and down there and I was down here and up there. You followin all that? We both had space on the first and second floor that neither one of us could efficiently manage. It never made sense to me and I always thought it would be perfect if we could just swap space. Less than a year later, we did just that.

That move allowed us to function and made sense. But it wasn't my ideal space. There was another office on campus that I always thought would be perfect for our program. I told my staff multiple times "In my dream world, if I could have any space on campus, I would have Student Activities." But I never thought it would happen. For multiple reasons.

But last week, when we moved in,  I was proved wrong.

It took a while and I had to work through bureaucracy and politics and back and forth but we got it!

I was so happy to have the new space that I didn't even mind spending two hours moving an entire room full of furniture and two storage areas crammed with stuff that was left behind by the department moving out. Oh, who am I kidding. I totally minded. I actually found it really rude and inconsiderate.

But not nearly as inconsiderate as leaving behind a filthy, disgusting desk. The pictures really don't even do it justice - it was GROSS!



Yes, that's RICE.


But the space. The space is great. So bring on the chaos and stress of moving and the desk full of rice...because TRIO has a new home!

Where I'm spending my days...
 Transition two...