Eeny Meeny Miny Mo

The same night I met my husband, I met another guy.  They both asked for my number and they both called.

Initially, I was more interested in the other guy. He was more aggressive.  He seemed more into me - he called me more and asked me out first. If you like me you gotta show me. And he did.

We spoke on the phone for about a week before our first date. He was a good guy and it was a good date. But he talked extensively about his ex-wife. That probably would have been fine except that I became concerned when I realized we sounded an awful lot alike.

The more stories he told the more I realized how similar we were. Everything that he complained about was stuff I did or would have done. Except they had only had sex on their wedding night and they were married like 4 or 5 years...I can't remember exactly but it was way too long for that to be okay.  And I wouldn't have done that because I thought that was seriously jacked up. 

It kinda freaked me out that he told me that.  One, that he felt comfortable enough to share that with me when we had just met. And then I just found the entire situation to just be so strange - like what kind of issues did she have? And did you not see her issues before you got married?  Or was she always unstable and you just didn't care...

It worried me about him too. More than just the fact that he over shared.  I don't know, you're okay to live like that - you just pretend that's normal? No talking, no therapy, no nothing? And the answer was no, because I asked.  Why aren't you fighting to resolve that issue? Obviously, it bothered you because your divorced and you're still talking about it...but it didn't bother you enough to try to fix it.  That was just odd to me. 

Of course, it's occured to me that it may not have even been true...another guy once told me something similar and that turned out to be total and complete BS. So what, is that written in the Guys Guide To Getting Laid? Is there a chapter instructing men to say they've been deprived? Is that what it is? Because that totally doesn't work. It just makes us wonder why they won't have sex with you and doesn't exactly reflect real well on your performance. So guys, you may just wanna skip that chapter.

Anyway, after that date I was pretty sure we were never going out again. Then he called and read me a poem he had written about me. I really like romantic gestures but it was too much. Poems after a week? You barely know me. It seemed so trite and forced and superficial.  And I kinda hate to admit it but that sealed the deal. That was the last time we ever talked.

13 years and two kids later I would have to say that kinda worked out in my husband's favor...