GRRRR

I am frustrated beyond measure!

A series of events have occurred lately to make me realize that I either have to lower my expectations or keep getting frustrated. Those are my options.

And I don't understand - are my expectations really that high? Am I being that unreasonable?

Surely not. Surely I'm not the only person out there with some understanding of professionalism? Right?

And I'm not talking inexperienced people here - these are people that should know better, but apparently don't.

Get it together and stop running an amateur show!  Whatever it is that you do, you should learn to do it well! At least take your job seriously enough to put some effort into it - otherwise, just go flip burgers somewhere.

Okay, I think I've expelled enough judgement for today. Rant over.

Confessional Monday

I could hardly get out of bed this morning. Part of that was the fact that my husband’s stupid weather alarm kept going off last night. Seriously, it felt like it went off every two hours. I was ready to rip the dang thing out of the wall and throw it out the window. And in my disoriented, sleep-deprived state I may have growled some type of violent threat because he finally got it in check. So I had just enough uninterrupted sleep to get into really good deep sleep when my alarm went off and it was time to start the day.

The other difficult part of getting out of bed was the actual getting out of bed. Physically it was just hard to do. Had a really, really active weekend and my poor, out-of-shape body was not prepared. Of course, this wouldn’t be a problem if I had been keeping up with the workouts. I’ve been walking but I have to confess that I haven’t had a home workout in over two weeks.

But that’s not my worst confession. Oh no, there’s more. Here’s a glimpse of some of my transgressions from this weekend:

1. I Watched Nearly Naked Men Gyrate: The husband had just gone to bed when I grab the remote, plop on the couch and look for something that doesn’t involve alligators, noodling, Alaska or surviving in the dessert. Not that I mind watching that kind of stuff but occasionally I like to watch a tv show with more dialogue then “Git it, git it! Yeah, that’s a big one thare.”

So I’m flipping through and guess what movie is about the start? Magic Mike. Now this was something that I thought would be kinda fun to see with a couple of girlfriends but not something I was just dying to see. Let’s be honest – no one is watching this movie for the plot. But it was a “see it now or never” kinda deal because there is no way the husband would watch that with me. So I decided to seize the opportunity and see what all the fuss was about. But I did feel kinda weird watching it alone. Like seedy old man talking to little girls weird.

2. I Don’t Like Men Gyrating, Nearly Naked Or Not: So I was able to determine that I’m not a fan of male strippers. There’s just something really unattractive to me about seeing guys in sparkly thongs prance around and pretend to pole dance. Ugh. Just no.

Sorry Channing Tatum, I know you’re supposed to be super hot but there was nothing sexy about you in that movie. And now,  you may be ruined forever because I’m just not sure I can ever get over the image of you humping the floor.

I can't unsee this...

3. My Father’s Day Present Was A Fail: You may remember my agonizing decision about a Father’s Day gift. I had planned to buy tickets to the Red River Rivalry. One of the best games every season – the atmosphere of that game is something every Sooner fan should experience. There’s nothing like it - it’s amazing!




I was about to buy the tickets when I was hit with another wave of fear – how is he going to feel about this? So, I decided I would do a trial run and see how that went. I didn’t actually pay for anything but I printed the confirmation so it looked like it had been paid for. I decided if he was okay then I could pay for them and we’d be good and if he wasn’t happy then I hadn’t lost anything.



Well, it was really really good that I hadn’t paid for them because the first thing he said was “You paid this much for tickets?” And they were expensive – we’ve gone before and found cheaper tickets – but they were the cheapest I could find this far in advance. So I explained that he was always doing big surprises for me and that I wanted to do the same for him and while he was appreciative, it bothered him to not be involved in the decision.

And the thing is, I knew it would. Because the way he grew up, he has this underlying fear of not having enough money and he only feels comfortable financially when he’s got control. And I don't mean control in the bad sense - I mean he feels secure when he's overseeing the budget. And so for me to make a purchase like this, it's outside his comfort zone.

So I was a little bummed that he didn’t like his gift (or the idea of his gift) but more bummed that I completely ignored who he was. Talk about fail!

4. I Suck At Parenthood: Sometimes I’m a great Mom. And sometimes I really suck. Like when I wake up to “The Tooth Fairy didn’t come last night!” My heart seriously sank. How? How did I forget that?

 There are a few basic principles of good parenting – keep them safe, keep them watered & fed, teach them about God, say I love you every day, introduce them to your favorite sports teams, and make sure they believe in Santa, the Easter Bunny, and the Tooth Fairy. That’s it – that’s all a kid needs to have a good childhood. Well, that and an occasional ice cream cone. But somehow, I can’t even manage to meet the minimum requirements.

We reasoned that since the tooth came out right before bed, M was put on the bottom of the list and since she has woke up so early (6 something) the Fairy was not done making her rounds. Dad rushed her to the bathroom and I went into ninja mode - run downstairs, grab money, run upstairs, grab tooth, shove money underneath pillow, run to back to bed - in under 60 seconds.

She came back upstairs and wanted to show me what a bad job the tooth fairy had done “Really Mom. My tooth is still there. She never took it!” So she dragged me out of bed to show me and surprise! The Tooth Fairy had finally caught up. Thank goodness for a save because I'm not sure I could have survived a disappointment like that.

Life's A Trip

Took a little road trip to Tulsa this past weekend. Decided to take the Hardrock Hotel & Casino up on their offer of a free room. Because who doesn’t like free? This is the third time I’ve gotten a free room from them so I must really be rockin those penny slot machines! My hubby is jealous that I keep getting all the free stuff when I’ve only been three times (2 of those were free) and I don’t spend very much money when I go. I can’t help it if I’m just lucky like that…

I also think that’s exactly why I keep getting rooms – I don’t spend enough money and they want to suck me in. Let them keep trying - I’ll enjoy the free rooms and continue to play with pennies. Win for me!

No roadtrip is complete without junk food!

90% of my trip was spent like this, tending to the childrens

On our way we made a detour to Eufaula to meet a contractor. That’s something we haven’t had very good luck with – good, reliable contractors. I think they know it’s hard for people like us, who don’t live near the area, to really stay on top of their work and it’s easy for them to do shoddy work because no one is around to check it. And once the job’s done – well, good luck getting them to come out again to fix it.

So the guy we met was outrageously overpriced and I was a little bit irritated that we had to meet him in the first place. Just give us a quote over the phone, like everyone else. Which I’m sure it was a tactic to size us up and see what we’d be willing to pay – which was definitely not what he was asking. I don’t know what made him think we had the kind of money he wanted. Dude, we’re driving a plain little car, have two kids in daycare and shop at Ross – how much free money do you think we have?

Our property is lakefront but nothing is really lakefront – the Corp of Engineers owns all the land that actually meets the lake. So there’s a little distance between where our land sits and our boat dock. It’s sloped land too, so you can’t actually see the dock from our land – you have to walk down to it. Since we’ve had so much rain, the lake is really up so we decided to check on the dock.

I was walking behind my husband – this is a safety strategy I adopted shortly after buying the land, I always let him go first because he could tolerate a snake bite better than I could - when he laughs and says “Well, the docks still there.” And I laughed too because it was funny to think it wouldn’t be. But then two steps later he says “Our walkway is gone.”

What?! WHAT?! And I run up to look for myself – like I’m gonna see something he didn’t. And it was gone. There are only two options to what happened – it was stolen by someone that knew we didn’t frequent the land or use the dock or it was so poorly constructed that when the lake came up it was pushed, crumpled and pulled off the land and sank. It was poorly constructed. We’d actually gotten quotes to fix it. Which makes it even more painful because we know exactly how much it’s going to cost.

Something kinda important is missing...

It wasn’t exactly what we wanted to find, but what can you do? So we just let it go and rolled on. We took the girls down to the pool once we got there and I started a water gun fight, although I totally got blasted. There’s just something super fun about ganging up on Mom. Especially when she gives strict instructions to not hit her in the face. Silly me, I didn’t know that direction actually translated to “My face is your number one target, ignore every other area of my body and just go for the face.” And that’s got to be the best spot because then you get to watch her makeup run down her face. And who doesn’t love that?

Isn't that lovely?

The next day we visited the Oklahoma Aquarium. It was pretty good – we got to see a lot of fish and watched the sharks being fed.

Did someone say shark?!?

I have to admit though, it really didn’t compare to the Texas State Aquarium. Of course, if I had my pick between having the best Aquarium or having the best football team…let Texas have the Aquarium!

Slippin Away

Emergency trip to Walmart this morning because as I was getting out of the car I looked down and realized my dress way too sheer for me to wear without a slip. Not see through but it was pretty thin. And once I noticed I just felt naked and exposed. So I run in, grab a slip and immediately run to the restroom to put it on. Well, not immediately. I did pay for it first. I’ve got an amazingly long list of character flaws but thievery is not one of them.

It wasn’t until I was walking to my car that I realized it was too big. Just big enough to keep sliding down. I probably should have turned right around and switched it out but I already had it on and the tags were off and I didn’t want to be late. So I did the only practical thing – rolled that sucker up and kept on going.

So now, no one can see through my dress but there is noticeably odd lumping around my waist. It looks like I tried to stuff my bra but the tissue has fallen and gathered on my stomach. This is way attractive, because nothing says sexy like some nice stomach lumps, right?

No worries though, I’ll just have to take advantage of my lunch date and eat enough to fill this baby out. Of course, after that I may have lumps of a different kind…

Table For One

I got stood up for dinner last night.

Maybe not technically stood up, but pretty close.

I did begin dinner alone. Not because I was actually alone, but because I don’t like eating cold food and I don’t like waiting on people who ignore me when I tell them dinner is ready.

That’s kind of a pet peeve of mine. If all you have to do is wait while someone cooks for you and then just show up when it’s ready – then the least you can do is show up. I don’t know why, it just burns me up to spend time cooking for someone only to discover they can’t pull themselves away from whatever they are doing to come eat it. Believe me, I would love to be vegging too, but instead I’m in here cooking for you. And after that, I get the honor of cleaning up too.

And really, I don’t mind doing those things. They have to be done and I’m happy to do it. But if you can’t extend me the courtesy of acting like you appreciate it enough to come to the table then it kinda starts to feel like servitude.

So I tell everyone dinner is ready. No one moves a muscle. I tell them again. Ignored. I say it one last time. Nothing.

And that was that. There is no use in nagging – besides making you look grouchy, it’s pretty ineffective. So I try hard not to do it.

Besides, if they wanted to wait and eat cold food and not join me for dinner, that was their choice.

So I sat down, said the prayer and started my dinner. That was my choice.

And actually, it was one of the nicest meals I’ve had in a while. It was quiet, I didn’t have to get up and get anything, and I didn’t have to spend the entire time trying to convince anyone to eat their vegetables.

I was close to a third way through when the rest of the family came in. The first thing M says is a shocked “Mommy, you’re eating without us!” to which I responded “Yes, I am.”

I think there would be more happy wives and mothers in the world if women would realize that you don’t have to give up the things you want or force others to want those things too. Just do your thing and be happy.

The others will make it to the table. Eventually.

To Buy Or Not To Buy, That Is The Question

Father’s Day is quickly approaching and I’m in a dilema. My husband doesn’t care about Father’s Day or his birthday; those things are just not a big deal to him. And it’s really hard to make something special when the other person isn’t into it. It’s like a waste of creative effort. Not that I don’t try.

Plus he has everything he wants. Well, except really big and super expensive stuff, like the four wheeler he mentions every time I ask for gift ideas. Really? Can you throw me a bone? Like something I can get at WalMart?

So I have a gift idea, something I think he would like and wouldn’t expect. The problem is I’m not sure about buying it without discussing it with him first. It isn’t super expensive but it would be noticeable. If I tell him what I want to do, I am sure he would say no. Not because he wouldn’t like it, but because he’s “fiscally conservative” and we’re on a tight financial plan so we can build our house within two years. So I’m pretty sure it would get an immediate veto and goodbye awesome Father’s Day surprise.

If I don’t say anything, I run the risk of upsetting him and spoiling the entire present. But I’m not sure it would. It could go either way – he could be surprised and happy or surprised and displeased. It’s a toss up.

I’m leaning towards just doing it. Partly because I have a strong tendency to temporarily ignore consequences in order to do what I want but mainly because he is always planning surprises for me – big ones too. And I think it might be nice, just this once, to do that for him.

In the meantime, I’ll put my feelers out and see what kind of vibe I get. Who knows, he may just end up with another OU shirt…

Watchdog

Had a conversation yesterday about my sometimes uncanny 6th sense. Not sure if I even believe in all that, although I have had some strange experiences. I’m not convinced, however, that most of that isn't pure observation. It’s amazing what you know when you just watch. Like something that happened to me years ago.

I worked in a department store and each night after closing we were responsible for closing out and counting down our drawers. We put all the cash in a bank bag and then had to take it over to the store till and turn it in. I worked downstairs, my boyfriend worked upstairs and he would usually come by to get me and we would go together.

One night I closed up and he wasn’t there so I just grabbed my stuff and was headed to the till when I look up and see him coming down the escalator. I started to walk towards him when I noticed his body language. And the new really cute blonde he was talking to.

It probably sounds like I was jumping to conclusions. But I knew him – his mannerisms, gestures, all his little nuances. It was obvious that he was flirting. The fact that he had his chest puffed up like a peacock and his sleeves pulled up just a tiny bit to show off his pecs didn’t hurt either.

So I just watched. Then I decided what I would do.

I have a pretty fiery temper and a big mouth so you may have expected me to do something crazy – but I’m not really fond of embarrassing and/or trashy public scenes. And no, I didn’t forget about this incident. I said I’m not fond of them, not that I never caused one. And in my defense, that was my one and only and I still burn with embarrassment over it.

So instead of acting like a fool, I just waited until they got in line.  Then I sauntered right up to him like nothing was wrong, gave him a little peck on the check and said “Hey, we need to stop and get toilet paper before we go home.” And then I looked at her, smiled and introduced myself.

The look on his face was priceless.