My Vagina Is On Fire

Sorry, guess I should give a little warning before I bust out with something like that…so consider yourself warned – this post isn’t for the light-hearted. Or for anyone offended by vagina.

So yeah, my vagina is on fire. Umm, no - it isn’t that kind of burning.  My actual lady parts are just fine. It’s just everything around it that’s an issue.  See, I have the misfortune of being the hairiest woman alive. Seriously, I have more body hair then most guys. I know, real attractive, right?

Since I prefer to not look like sasquatch, I try to take care of that stuff.  I’m a big believer in depilatory cream. It’s easy, inexpensive but most of all – it tames that beastly hair.  So that’s about all I’ve ever done. I’ve never tried waxing – it just sounds painful.  I know it’s really supposed to work but I can’t get past the idea that scorching hot wax and my vagina are two things that should never meet.

Plus, I feel like I have a lot of freedom with the cream. I can take my time and make sure it looks exactly the way I want it too. And I can get creative when the mood strikes. Yes, I admit I’ve been known to sport different designs. But that’s more for fun than anything else because who doesn’t love finding a surprise heart on Valentine’s Day?

So I do the magic cream and shave in between to keep the bikini line clean. And that’s always worked pretty well for me. Until the other day, when I decided that it would just be quicker to shave. Not a maintenance shave, but a full shave. We were getting ready to swim, I was already in the shower and thought it would save some time to do it right then.  And it did save time.

But oh my god, I will never do that again. Totally, totally not worth it. My whole private region itches like you wouldn’t believe and there is no way to relieve that itch without looking like I should be charged with lewd and lascivious acts.  Yeah, the deodorant trick didn’t work this time.

In case you don’t know, you can use deodorant after a shave to keep it from getting irritated. You will want to be careful, though, about the scent of deodorant you use. I would avoid anything musky or sports scented. It doesn’t make a difference in how it works but it will keep you from having to explain why you smell like a dude down there.

So the important lesson here kids, is that you should just stick to the things that work because if you try to take a shortcut, you might just get burned…