Literally. I have. I don't know how but it has happened.
Driving home today I look down at the speedometer and I wonder why we are going so slow. Then I start to get aggravated. Okay people, we're in the fast lane, let's go fast! Really? This is ridiculous! And then, out of nowhere it dawns on me. I'm not in the fast lane. I'm in the far right lane. The slow lane. And I have been the whole time. How? How does that happen? Definitely a wow moment.
I'm chalking it up to distractions/stress and not the fact that I'm just turning into a ditz. Ugh, please, don't let that happen. In my defense, I do have a lot on my mind. A lot. I'm dealing with budget stuff and quite honestly it's got me freaked out. I don't know why...I guess just the magnitude of the responsibility. And I'm still finding my balance. In the beginning I was overly cautious and didn't want to spend anything, I was so worried about making the money last. Now, I'm worried that I've been too frugal.
And that is SO annoying. I hate second guessing myself. I'm used to being confident in my decisions so I don't know what this is all about. One day I feel like I got this and the next I'm all what the hell am I doing?
But I've always been an extremist - I'm all the way in or all the way out. If I'm into it, I'm really into it. And I think that the eat it up, all consuming, hungry enthusiasm can be good sometimes. It can also be challenging, and challenging for those around me. I'm like a tidal wave - I can swallow people whole. It's not a ride that everyone enjoys...
I'm off to catch up on emails and address a few other work things....so maybe tomorrow I'll know which lane I'm driving in.
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